I’m having a hysterectomy next week. Tuesday at 12:15 p.m. to be exact.
This has not been an easy decision. I’ve gone back and forth over the last couple of years pondering, should it stay or should it go.
See, I’m one of those people that typically believe our body parts should be left intact. Like tonsils. They have a purpose, leave ‘em be. You start taking things out and messing with the original design and next thing you know you’ve opened up Pandora’s box. Maybe I shouldn’t use the box analogy. Let’s go with can of worms. So, I tried to leave my uterus in place. I sought alternative treatments. I ignored it. But then I got fed-up and decided to get rid of it.
My friend, Renee, has a good theory on removing it. She equated my uterus with an old, worn-out sofa that still sits in the living room not being used but taking up precious space. She says I don’t need my uterus anymore; it’s served its purpose, now it’s just in the way. “You’d throw out the old sofa, wouldn’t you?” she asked. Well, yeah, I suppose so.
I really like my doctor. He has a great “bedside manner.” I don’t like that term. What else can we call it? How about, I really like the way he communicates and discusses things with me. I don’t feel like I’m just another uterus to him. He did a great job with the touchy subject of all the horrible, awful things that can go wrong during surgery, but sign on the dotted line anyway. I was feeling pretty good about this decision until I heard all those disclaimers. Crikey. Please don’t let me fall in the 1% of people that those things happen to, because someone has to be the 1%.
So, as my friend Brooke, who has such an uncanny way with words, says, “Goodbye, periods! Goodbye, sanitary pads! Goodbye, wings that stick to your pubes and yanks them every time you pull your panties down to go pee! Goodbye, inexplicable bloating!”
I won’t be driving for a couple of weeks. But if all goes as planned – a laparoscopic procedure, no complications – I should be back on my feet in a week or so, just taking things gingerly for a short spell. Feel free to give me a call or drop me a line or loan me a good movie if you have one on DVD that you recommend.